There are moments in your life where time seems to move just a little faster than you’d like.
Mr. Manning was supposed to arrive in airport at 9:30pm that evening. His plane was running 15 minutes late and he was the last one off the plane.
He was used to inconspicuously disappearing into the crowds once he arrived, methodically weaving his way through the baggage claim and casually leaving the airport for the next deal. This weekend was different. Something special was going down.
A man in a black suit, black cowboy hat, expensive glasses and a slight 5 o’clock shadow greeted Mr. Manning. Mr. Manning couldn’t quite pin-point the accent, but it was definitely foreign, East European, maybe Russian. In any case, this man who had introduced himself as Boris, claimed that Mr. Manning’s “friends could not make it” and he would give him a ride. Mr. Manning obligingly followed Boris to the nearest escalator down to baggage claim.
As they neared the escalator, two extraordinarily tall men, also in black suits, but with black sunglasses quickly stepped out from a set of nearby doors. Both had obviously just taken their index fingers away from the ear buds in their ears.
The adrenaline started pumping through my veins. had dealt a few exciting deals in the past. This was going to be another.
The first bodyguard had dark hair, also likely Russian. I thought his name must be Krutchkov. He had a methodical and deliberate look to him. The second had short blonde hair. Likely German. He must be named Manfred. Not someone you wanted to mess with even at the best of times. I really didn’t even want to look at Manfred.
Boris casually led the way with Manfred in front and Krutchkov behind me. Manfred mumbled into the sleeve of his jacket, “Charlie to Bravo, the maple leaf has arrived, I repeat, the maple leaf has arrived.” Nobody said anything else. As we turned the corner at the base of the escalator, I scanned the large room as I normally do. It was a relaxed area, a couple of car rental girls were leaning on their counters casually chattering back and forth. Families were sitting on benches and standing nearby, gossiping in the usual excited way people do at the airport.
Two more bodyguards were waiting near the baggage claim. They had surely checked the area to make sure it was safe and besides, I thought for sure they should intimidate anybody from trying anything. None of the four were really blocky, but they all had lots of ribs, so those would surely stop a few bullets if they were directed our way. And we also had Boris. I was convinced he must have at least six guns jammed in various pockets. He was about two feet shorter than any of the guards, but I was becoming convinced he was leading the pack for a reason.
The remaining guards were a few inches shorter than the first two, but still dwarfed me. If they didn’t have the same outfit on as Krutchkov and Manfred, they could have doubled as evil circus clowns. They both had a comical grin that you could only just see. They must be called Egor and Vladimir. If I wasn’t going to look at Manfred, I sure wasn’t going to look at Egor and Vladimir. Just at a glance I was convinced they could snap my spine with those beady Russian eyes. It was likely best they were hiding behind the sunglasses. However, I kept my calm, collected look. Thankfully I was the one that would be paying for these guys’ services.
I thought I’d help my confidence some so I casually reached into my pocket and pulled out my Blackberry. Sure enough, ten emails, five missed calls and two voicemails. I nonchalantly informed the guys of my importance and then told Boris what my luggage looked like. Boris spat out some words in something resembling Russian in the general direction of Egor, who must have been the dumb one, or maybe just the youngest. He didn’t look too slow but I wasn’t about to look into his eyes to check for that blank, vacant beady eyed stare.
By this time the bodyguards had made a loose circle around me. The entourage had obviously attracted some attention, so I continued casually look around and checking for anybody suspicious. None of the Blackberry messages were important. A message from some crazy woman in who was still irate at me for not giving her the right cut of a bank heist, and then a couple emails from Chinese contacts needing arms shipments into . Nothing new.
I tried to make a little small talk with Krutchkov, and we quickly got to pay. He was very convinced that this was a fine set of bodyguards considering our location. I looked at Manfred and was about to look behind me at Egor and Vladimir, but remembered the beady eyes, under the sunglasses. We got on to how they would get paid. It wasn’t going to be cash - that became obvious quick - especially given they didn’t even recognize the Canadian cash I flashed that was in my wallet. They seemed to be favourable to US treasury bonds or gold bricks. Egor tapped my backpack to see how heavy it was and check if I had any bricks in it. I sarcastically informed him, that the bricks still had the invisible x-ray paint on them so they could get by the customs guys. That seemed to satisfy him. Maybe I had guessed right and he was that slow, or maybe he knew I was scared of him.
Then out of the corner of my eye I noticed a slightly pot bellied, middle aged man come walking our way. He looked irate. I reached into my pack. All I had was my P22 water pistol. I hoped the other guys had something more powerful on them. Worse yet, Boris was between me and this fearless 50 year old. They would be wiping me up for months to come if Boris unleashed any of the guns I was sure he had. Again, I was glad I was the one with the money.
What happened next shocked me. “Who do you think you guys are? Terrorists?” Boris and I nervously exchanged glances. Then the truth came out. “Come on. Someone special? Mormon missionaries maybe? Take those sunglasses off! This is un-American, you terrorists!” Well that was a relief. He was just a radical republican. Now, granted this guy didn’t look like an Italian mobster, or part of the Ukrainian Mafia, and we were in Rapid City, South Dakota, but I had still been expecting some sort of battle.
Vladimir and Manfred knew the drill. They must have been brothers because they both cued up together, turned to face the guy, and tipped their shades down just a bit so that the guy could see Vladimir’s beady Russian eyes and Manfred’s cold blue eyes; just like the dad off American Chopper might do. Now he was the one on his heels.
Then I moved in to calm the situation. “Sir, these are just my friends and I’m from , eh.”
He repeated his un-American terrorist line, glared at the guys, told them to take the glasses off again, and walked away. That was it. I was sure I saw the evil clown smile on Egor and Vladimir this time. Boris twitched a couple times, muttered something into his sleeve and then adjusted a bunch of things under his jacket. I put my P22 water pistol away.
The carousel had just started so Egor scampered over to grab my luggage. The six of us formed up and left the building. We were joined by Kosenila and Bezubaia. Both gorgeous and professional, despite their names.
As we left the airport, the cavalcade was ready and waiting. A Chevy Blazer was in front and back, a pair of bodyguards at each. I didn’t see the AK-47’s but knew they were there. A Buick was sitting between the Blazers with another bodyguard. He was about three feet shorter than the other bodyguards and looked like he was Mexican. I lovingly called him Jose.
Then we quietly sped off into the lights of . The rest, I cannot tell you. Suffice it to say, the main event came off without a hitch. The two main people, who I will call Lance and Nicole, left the scene shortly after midnight on Sunday, in a vehicle that may or may not have been stolen, and made their getaway. It was a good deal and they pulled it off smooth and with style. They were smiling the whole time and I’m sure it was the best “event” they’d done together…so far!
Mr. Manning thanks his bodyguards, “Lance” and “Nicole” for
a very exciting adventure! Some deals
are just average. Others are
unforgettable. Mr. Manning won’t forget
this deal!
"Nicole" and "Lance" pondering their next move.
Below:
Top Row (l-r): Driver/Bonslov, Egor, Vladimir, Krutchkov, Manfred
Front Row (l-r): Driver/Nakita, Kosenila, Boris, Jose, Bezubaia
Missing: "Lance", "Nicole", Nick-olas (video surveillance)
Excuse me for just a moment, I just a text message on my Crackberry. “Hurricanes batter the US Coast. Cyclones tear up the Aussie East Coast. China battles suffocating heat. India stricken with extreme drought. Global Warming the Culprit.” That’s beautiful. What a wonderful spin my media guys are doing on the headlines. Oh wait, good thing we caught it. My mistake; “Climate Change,” not “Global Warming.”
Mr Gore has got out of the gates quicker than I have. I really should have seen it coming. I’m suspicious I’m close to the root of everyone being green and sustainable, though. To be sustainable and environmentally sensitive means good business. Royal Dutch Shell has caught on. I’m not sure if Gazprom or Petrobras has, but they can still hire hitmen to shut the critics up. The movement is still young. Mr Gore may have a head start on me in this area of global domination, but he hasn’t got there yet.
This is my plan. I will play the game like my friends who just bought a large chunk of the Texan utility giant TXU. We plan a dozen or so brand spanking new coal power plants to keep up with increased power demand. Then, we give in to our spin masters. Yes, this won’t be sound for the environment. But, because we are environmentally conscious we will wait. We will try out clean coal, or maybe uranium, how about wind power. Yes, there is a lot of wind in Texas. At the same time we throw green ideas back and forth, energy demand goes through the roof and the poor pilgrims fall victim to increasingly outrageous power bills and the joy of rolling blackouts. Happy days…for my bank account!
And don’t get me started on the joys of Carbon Trading!
But we haven’t quite come to the crux of it all yet. While our ‘religious’ friends are feuding around the world, we need a happy, feel-good ‘religion’ for all our liberal friends out there. Something akin to a lovely pot of ethnic and religious stew. Something that will provide the chance to truly bring the world together, united by a slimy, yet rather tantalizing gravy. (My expertise is in world domination, not cooking by the way.) We just need a few more gargantuan natural disasters to strike fear into the hearts of everyone that CO2 emissions are bad and they should join us in this lovely gravy. Then we can come together under one happy green banner, and all hug the earth as one happy family. We will all be void of our religious and ethnic intolerances, all striving side by side in an effort to save humanity and our fellow human being. Battling Mother Nature whom we have so badly wronged.
Oh, my Crackberry again. Another text. Apparently our Pentecostal friend has sneezed on our Islamic friend. Ok, plan change. This lovely stew is only going to last so long. Pull money from Energy and Environmental Equity; transfer to Credit Suisse Account; transfer to Boris my arms manufacturer; 2 more orders of nukes, thanks; ship to…
Got to go, I’ve got to make a few quick calls here.
I've invented a new religion. It seems like the next logical step in taking over the world.
Back when I was just a knee-high, a friend named Karl and I would play chess. He inevitably won, but I let
him. He was a couple years my senior and I thought it would be an
embarrassment to him. I really only learned a couple things from
Karl.
1) Jews brew up odd ideas, like community-ism/communism,
2) Socialism and religion brew a boring,
stagnant mix. Observe Catholicism. And,
3) Religion is the opium of the people.
So, let’s get out the mixing bowls brothers and sisters, and try our hand at baking religion. Let’s take a charismatic Protestant, a few years of boredom, a touch of yeast, and a healthy pinch of capitalism. Stir vigorously. Bake, preferably in a microwave, for a year. Let’s call it Pentecostalism. Don't let it cool, eat it hot. If regular religion was opium, then I think this is the crack cocaine of religion.
It all started on in LA in 1906. Since then its spread all over the world and is now at around 150 million world wide. The biggest congregation is in South Korea. It's actually the biggest Christian church totalling 780,000 people. Not too shabby, eh?! Comparing that to the 1.1 billion Catholics, it's gaining quickly. I suspect that it'll continue the 20% growth per year, which should set it up to pass the Catholics in about 10 years, assuming they are converting as fast as they're dying. I think that's a safe assumption for a socialist based group.
Why has Pentecostalism grown so much? The gatherings are like rock concerts. These spirit-filled events and the buzz everyone gets through their conversion seems to be quite contagious. They share it with all their friends and what can I say, the stats speak for themselves. Everyone from every walk of life is flocking to it, and that’s just fine by this little world ruler.
This brings me back to two wonderful parts of Pentecostalism: capitalism and capitalism. These people are splendid. They tithe like Christ was coming tomorrow, and in fact, many do feel He will return within their lifetime. Maybe that's the reason for the growth. In any case one of the poorest parts of the world, Guatemala City, just popped out a 15,000 church building/stadium, paid with $20 million in cash. Or maybe the thing that I adore about this whole deal is that they are building Burger King drive-thru's onto their churches. Not only do they provide revenues to the church, it also helps buoy the economy through all the health care activity.
Whether it’s good business or trying to follow God, it’s got people hooked. The only problem that may occur is when all this hits Islam. I'm working on that one, but I don't think I'll get out of the arm's dealing business.
Next on the agenda, plotting how to beat out my arch nemesis, Mr Gore, as King of Environmentalism.
One thing I’ve learned over the last bit: when you’re planning on taking over the world you tend to be busy. I guess it all started somewhere shortly after returning from Kenya. I began to get frustrated with my friend Omar al-Bashir, President of Sudan. I asked him the simple question, ‘Why are you not more peaceful Omar? Why all the death and destruction in Darfur?’ He told me the Chinese made him do it. So I went to the source and asked my tennis buddy President Hu how and why Omar told me this. He shrugged and said the oil made him do it. So I put two and two together and figured the American government had something to do with it.
By now I was beginning to become a little irritated at all of them. Why can’t these people get along? What makes everyone so greedy? And I suppose any sane human would then ask, what can I do to make the situation better?
I decided I’d rob the International Monetary Fund. Rumour had it they had 3200 odd tonnes of gold tucked away in their back rooms somewhere. The third largest hoard of gold should do it. That, I thought, would give me some bargaining power. So I did it. It was fun. Guess where they hid it. I’m not going to tell you!
But I realized it wouldn’t be enough. So, I took the Chinese approach. Buy American treasury bonds with my IMF gold. I thought “Now I’ve got them over the barrel and I’ve still got bargaining power.” Then I realized the treasury bonds were becoming worthless along with the US$. What to do then? Selling all my treasury bonds would cause the economy to collapse. It seemed the only option was to buy more and prop it up. I was getting myself far too deep in this.
BUT, I still had buying power…Power…POWER. So I thought I would buy myself a few nukes on credit. The Russians seemed to be ok with that. Any good economic power has a few weapons, was my theory, and if it straightened out all these greedy little dictators it would all be worth it. There was this one special nuke I got. It had a double full-metal jacket, 32 - Polonium 210 laced warheads with ultra high definition GPS tracking for superior explosion optimization. It’s even got this cool little radiation sticker on the side of it too!
This power thing is becoming addictive. My plan as of tonight is to pick out three of my tinier nukes. I’m considering writing “from your friends in Iran” on one of my mini nukes and sending that Mr. Bush’s way. The second would have “from your friends in India.” I’d send it to Pakistan. The last one I’d send to China “from your friends in Taiwan.” That should keep all them busy. In the mean time I will quietly promote peace and once I had earned trillions off my arms dealing business I would finance a global political campaign to place me as ruler of the world. A peaceful world leader, all under the banner of promoting…yes, environmentalism! The opposition: I’ll simply ruthlessly crush them. It’s fool proof. Don’t tell anyone though.
There were many adventures in the last two weeks or so of the trip. I will rattle off a few of them and give some thoughts on my experince in Kenya.
The Funeral and Treats Afterwards
Immediately after my last main post, Josiah and I visited a funeral that one of the local ladies we knew was going to. We didn't find out what the fellow had died from, but it was similar to our funerals. They had a form of service, they took donations for the family, then after some prayers, took the casket to the grave (behind one of their houses) and the group sang the whole time they filled the grave back in. Everyone basically dispersed after this, but there was singing and dancing later that evening. Josiah and I didn't go to that. We also experienced an odd food encounter. The pastor had seen us (still can't see why we stood out) and invited us into a hut. There on the table was some ogali (really thick crushed millet thats been cooked) and what I thought at first was snake. I'm sure they saw the look of shook, then explained it was talapia, a fish we had had before, but this time it was completely intact. It tasted like canned salmon but they expected us to eat everything. I hesitantly put back the gills while Josiah bravely had an eyeball and a few other parts of the head; which they claimed made you smarter. I feel just as dumb today and I wasn't prepared to try it again.
How to Butcher a Bull in Kenya
Also on the "food" subject we "got to" see some of the locals butchering a bull. Only the police have AK-47's and Uzi's so they had to get back to the basics to kill the poor creature; ropes and a knife I'm sure was as sharp as a stick. I got a few pictures of the peoples experssions during the dirty deed rather than the poor beast. The meat was very tough.
There were a few times I could have strangled Josiah. They were having beef at lunch one of the days and apparently they value every part of the creature. So on the plate were several types of beef I had never seen. Josiah eagerly challenged Bill and I to sample some of it; my sample being some inside out stomach. Two words: never again.
More Blood and Gore - Tales of the Soul
The next slightly crazy thing that occurred was on a nice afternoon, a bunch of us guys decided to play keep away in the lake with a big plastic water bottle. They had been playing for a few minutes prior to me showing up, but we repicked teams with the new additions and started a raucous game of keep away. But within about two minutes, no joke, down goes one of my guys in obvious pain. I thought pulled groin, or maybe he had strained something throwing the water bottle. But when I told him to pull his foot up out of the water, we saw he had wiped a 2" by 3.5" piece of skin off the soul of his foot...and a nice thick chunk at that. So eek, Josh throws Seth over his shoulder and then I piggy back him for the last bit to the guest house we were staying at. Good thing there aren't too many carnivorous beast around there; they would have had no problems following the blood trail. It was decided fairly quickly that this was a job for a doctor and hauled poor Seth away. He was a brave kid (19yr-old kid) and handled the plethora of needles and stitching quite well.
A Half Day Trip to the ATM
A couple of other events were a trip to Migori. We spent 2 hrs driving each way then several hours trying to withdraw money, first from the ATM but the power was out, then the bank which had generators but took ages to do the processing. It turned into a half day ordeal just getting money. But ordeals can still be adventures. We only got one flat tire on this trip. Below is a picture of one of the bridges we crossed. They were panning for gold in this river.
Not Sure the Coast Guard would approve of this Trip
One of the afternoons we took a short boat trip out to an island near where we were staying. About 44 of us piled into one of the fishermans boats for the short journey (about 20min) over to the island. It wasn't the lack of life jackets that bothered me, but rather the abundance of water pouring into the boat through various little holes and that when Josh asked if anyone could swim they all put up there hands and laughed. In any case we all survived and had a nice little voyage.
The Historic Site
One afternoon after being hounded incessantly by the locals to go see the "historic sight," Josiah and I finally decided we'd go. We were both very thirsty, which seemed to happen somewhat regularly, and we were racing sunset (and the onset of potentially getting mugged), but we went anyway. It should be noted that no matter what you do, it is next to impossible to get things done there. Even trying to hunt down some water got us into a conversation with a guy who wanted to take us to his farm, which we had to tear ourselves away from and abandon the water idea; if we didn't just go we'd never even start.
So we set on our way, both Josiah and I were a little grumpy and Josiah set a pace of near speed walking, while I walked behind our guide trying not to laugh, then not choke on my dry throat. We had both learnt left and right so it was random yells of acheech or ajung as we weaved our way through the maize (corn) fields.
The Routine
Our routine for the week and a bit we were by Lake Victoria consisted of something like this:
We would wake up. No alarms here, just the sun and there was no stopping these people. When the sun came up, they got up. We had one overcast day that threw things off and everyone slept in. BLISS. After waking up we would go bathe in the lake. It was usually nice and warm and the algea was usually at a minimum in the morning. I really did enjoy going for a morning swim. Those were a highlight!
Then breakfast. If we were lucky we got eggs, Chapati (a crepe like bread), and on the rare occasion some fruit. Usually it would be white bread, popcorn, groundnuts (peanuts) and chai (hot water and hot milk with sugar-I learned to enjoy that, it also helped me enjoy the other food because my tongue was burnt half the time and I could only taste half the stuff.).
At some point we had some form of church service at the center. This was never on time, but I still got something out of it, through the translation. The center was an Itilian Scout (boy/girl scouts) built complex that they had started about ten years back. They had an amphitheater type thing, several guest buildings, a kithchen/school house, satelitte internet, a chicken coupe, a small medical center, computer lab and sewing center. They also had a fish pond and a broken windmill that I believe generated electricity at one point. It was an impressive place, all things considered.
After services Rose, the wife of one of the guys we were staying with at the guest house, would watch Josiah and I like a hawk and make sure we didn't leave. She wanted to make sure we both stayed near and got a good lunch. She only failed once. (She was an extremely hard worker and the most wonderful lady) I know I was always stuffed after lunch, mainly on talapia (fish) and the ogali bread.
I always felt like sleeping in the afternoon, but we always got up to something, whether it was talking to someone or going for some odd adventure.
By sunset, I was always exhausted. By this time everyone had made their way back to the guest house and sometimes had another swim. We had some enjoyable chat around the keroseen lamp and many fights with little kenyan kids in the tent we slept in.
But alas we had to wait until 9pm to have supper. It was often the best meal with either fish or chicken, potatoes, fried bananas that tasted like potatoes (let me tell you, that was a disappointment. Expecting something sweet and what?!...more potatoes.) So by the time we finished off more chai, I was utterly exhausted.
Then we had to sleep in a tent made for about 6 that we jammed two white boys and sometimes got 6 Kenyans in. If I had a comfort bubble before leaving, I quickly had to readjust it. Sleeping (or trying to) with a couple kids draped over you does that. So that was a rough outline of the routine for the last week along Lake Victoria.
A Break in Mombasa
Bill had wanted to go to Mombasa at the end of the trip so we all decided to hop on a bus Friday morning and go to resort near Mombasa. We brought a long a couple of the guys with us. We left at an outrageous hour. 5am if my only partially coherent brain caught the time correctly. I believe we also repaired a flat tire even before we left the guest house. But we hopped on a bus in Migori after having morning tea and started a 7ish hr drive into Nairobi. It was a beautiful trip. A lot of very green farms. As we got closer to Nairobi it got dryer and we saw the Masia herding their cattle and goats. We also saw some giraffe, zebras, and baboons!!
In Nairobi we had a quick snack and hopped on the train to Mombasa. We had a nice train meal and hopped into bed. I had a chat with a dude from Wisconsin who had taken up talking like a European and was doing some UN type work in Burundi. That evening I started getting sick, just in time for our break in Mombasa. We stayed in a nice resort on the ocean and the Kenyan guys thought it was amazing. They had never had hot running water and I think they abused that privilege. They also abused the fine food (I did too, I'll admit) and were amused with the european food, "that's not real food, you've got to be joking.(roughly translated)"
I truly wish I could have felt better and enjoyed the swimming and all with the guys. But I was bed ridden, sweating and feeling like my innards had been beaten with sticks. I went to the hospital the day we left and then we proceeded to take the train back to Nairobi. It was a beautiful spot.
Treetops
Prior to going to treetops I had made up my mind that I was going to pack it in. I did not feel that it was going to be healthy to continue on and we decided to proceed with that in mind. I wanted to do one more thing though. Dad had read many stories to us kids about Jim Corbet and Treetops and I wanted to visit the place. It was a last minute booking which caused us some grief, but Josiah, Mitulu and I headed two hours north of Nairobi, near Mt Kenya to this game park. The moment we arrived we were greeted by a black rhino. I think we were all a little stunned. There were also some wild buffalo lurking near the bus we entered in. We had a late supper which tasted good after riding the train for most of the day from Mombasa. We were then interrupted and told there were now elephants at the watering hole. Treetops is a small hotel on stilts above a swamp where the animals come to drink. Apparently all these animals are a regular occurance.
The next day we went on a game drive and saw more elephants, some very close, buffalo, deer, boars (some that were very rare) and deer. The air in the park was some of freshest we had smelt in a very long time. A welcome relief to the dirty diesel smell of Nairobi and many of the roads.
The Return Home - On a Wing and a Prayer
We spent a day in Nairobi recovering and getting gifts. Then with a prayer that I would actually catch an early wing out of Kenya (which against the odds I did) I joined Bill and Josiah on the flight to Amsterdam. I parted with them there then took a mish mash of flights: From Amsterdam, to Detriot, to New York, then after a night in the Newark airport again, against the odds, was called up 8min prior to my flight leaving and told that I could make it on and was given a first class seat. From there I limped into Minneapolis and with great relief crashed into Saskatoon. Here I am currently being a useless blob lacking all energy and writing endless blogs about Kenya.
Thoughts on Kenya - Is there a Road to Recovery?
My trip to Kenya was very thought provoking. Not only have I learned a lot about myself, but I have also had to question and think about the future of both the Africans and ourselves. We were not tourists during our time in Kenya. We were right in there among the locals, which made it very hard physically and mentally. I/we saw some depressing stuff.
The African people are very different from those with a European decent. Please don't take this as me beng racist; I'm simply curious why everyone has devloped the way they have. It struck me that they have had the mindset of defeat ingrained in them. Inevitably most of the people you would talk to would ask for some form of handout. Even the lack of development and the drive amongst the people to want to improve and develop what they have was lacking. As a comparison, take the people settling western Canada versus those in the sticks of Kenya. Both faced disease. Both had to struggle to grow food and under similar circumstances, lacking money and resources. Both had to find a source of water. Both had decent land to work with. The canadians had to battle winter. The canadians have managed to progress significantly over the last 100yrs while the kenyans have stayed more or less stagnant for a long time. Why????? I felt that they were just as smart as an average canadian. The only thing that I can think of is the mindset. Maybe Europeans have been blessed with the drive to progress and innovate. Either that or cursed with a greed for more stuff. However you look at it, the Africans have very different personalities.
It appears in many ways. How they treat the environment. They have no garbage systems and plastic litters the towns. They cut down all their trees for heating and cooking and have left much of their surroundings barren. Nutrition and diet are lacking. If water conditions aren't that bad they do have the ability to grow a bit of a variety of food. They stick religiously to their starch and fish and the malnutrition is evident amongst the kids.
The disease and suffering evident in Kenya is really overburdening. I met so many orphans and wow that is always a stab in the heart. There are so many people that need help and we Westerners can help them out. But they have relied on, and expect our handouts; us giving them fish. Despite doing it several times on a small scale myself (I left with very few clothes and gave several other items away) I don't feel right giving fish when what they really need is to learn how to fish. Again that requires Western help a lot of times to get things started, but choosing who to teach how to fish is a challange and we can't solve all their problems. I guess we can all try and do a small part and help who we can in an appropriate manner. We can also remember just how blessed we are, having everything we do and pray for the day when Christ returns and God will "wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there shall no longer be any death; there shall no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away." And that, God, I believe is the only road to recovery.
If you've slogged your way this far, thank you. I hope some of my stories and thoughts were interesting and maybe sparked a few thoughts. Argue with me if you wish!!!
Enough barmy yarns for today. Take care,
Evan
The last week and a bit has been crazy. It's been People People People. Travel. People People People. Travel. It was been a fascinating but extremely draining, and in particular, mentally draining. It's been summed up by my landing in a hospital in Mombasa, having tests for malaria, viciously hunting down the lone mosquito in my inspection room, then to my relief being told I have pnuemonia...sort of.
I've decided to come home, which is a bit of an anti climax, but we think it is wise, and thanks for the backing fam'. Next challenge will be weaving my way home. Thank you for your prayers!
I will post more in a few days of the other amazing stories and sights we have seen!!!
Love you all very much
Evan
Welcome to Lake Victoria...Thank You. I'm widening my vocabulary by leaps and bounds! I would like to think anyway, while my English skills plummet attempting to have the locals make sense of what I'm saying in english.
We arrived safely (even though I had my doubts at many points between Kisumu and here)! The roads had been "improved since Josh and Bill had been here last but there were still some rather large potholes along the way and par for the course was swerving wildly between the potholes, bicycles and cattle. I had got the flu that morning and that didn't make it as enjoyable as it otherwise would have been.
The spot beside the lake is very nice. The shore is rocky but we have swum several times and it is almost like a camping trip in some ways. We bathe in the lake and slept outside in a tent the last two nights. We've made sure tentt is far enough from the edge of the lake so we don't have any run ins with hippo's. And yes, I saw my first hippos yesterday. It was too far away to get a picture but the thing was huge. Otine, the guy we were with when we saw it said that many people get killed by hippo. We couldn't get out of him how many a year.
We also went to a small market to grab some food which was fascinating. I still have to get used to the smell of the local fish, talapia. Turns the stomach. On the way there the fan guard broke off on us and thankfully we were close to town so we were able to get it welded up for 350 schillings (1CND=70KSH)
Well, I've got to cut this short. My attempt to load pictures on here has failed so I'll give that a go next time. I've got the inet lady here and another guy waiting ; both are looking over my shoulder!
Love you all,
Evan
We spent Friday looking around Nairobi. For the most part it is quite similar to a first world city. Many of the people are walking around in their business attire and for the most part it looks wealthy in the downtown. In the evening we went to catch our train and then it began to hit. The train station was also close to the bus stop and it was mayhem there. People yelling and pointing and its a game of chicken all the time with vehicles. If your hesitant at all you won't get into a roundabout; the guy that was driving for us had little to no fear...either that or he sacred everyone else-we seemed to do quite well in traffic.
The train ride was an intreresting experience. We saw some of the slums as we were leaving the city and WOW. Corrugated metal roofs with mud or brick or wood walls jammed together, very little room at all and tonnes of them. I can really see how disease could spread quickly in those places.
It was dark as we were travelling so it was alittle hard to see things but aside from constantly getting smacked in the face with diesel fumes when you stuck your head out the window, it was cool. I met a civil engineer (same age as myself) from waterloo so it was cool chatting to him about his travels.
When we got here to Kisumu we got toured around some by a family Josh had met last time he was here. The daughter had been trying to get a visa and he had ran into her at the US embassy. They stayed in touch and the girl was "fortunate" enough to get the visa. So the family was very greatful to have us over. We got a short boat ride on lake Victoria (ssketchy boat-you could see the water trickling between your legs from leaks), were given amazing amounts and very tasty Kenyan food. I'm being snowed with all sorts of local terms. I think I've only got two so far. Assante-thankyou and Jambo-Welcome.
I've got so many thoughts running through my head right now on perspectives between the different cultures, and apperently I'm still jet lagged enough that wit is being kept to a minimum. I'm guessing more of both of these will surface shortly...hopefully with shorter posts.We're in for the ride of our life tomorrow to the small townn we will spend the next little bit at...ooops hold on killing malaria mosqitoes...Have a great week! Be thankful you could wake up to nothing but hope and faith...again!
Love, Evan
It's 10am here in Nairobi. We arrived safely last night at about 6pm. A lot has happened since the last post, partially because I haven't slept for most of the time since then.
We went into New York City Tuesday night in unadulterated NYC fashion. Josh, Josiah, Ning (friend of Josh's) and I all jumped in the Nissan truck, grabbed a meal from Burger King on the fly (I tried to take the healthy route out with a salad...not sure that was any better) and after spending an hour gunning it down the New Jersey Turnpike and Garden State Highway we arrived to about a 30min wait in traffic as we inched our way into the city. The amount of steel and concrete in that place amazes me!
The number of people amazed me too. There was one river crossing (also known as a bridge) where there were seriously 7 lanes each way and then another bridge beside it with another 3 lanes eachway and those are jammed at rushhour. It's not uncommon for people to have 1.5 ish hr commute. Land of the free? The poor people are enslaved to their jobs. Really makes working around home look good! Another funny thing is everyone has the bluetooth things for their cell phone, where they have the earbud. It seems 3 minute cell conversations are all the rage!
We saw the Empire State building from a distance, walked along 5th Ave and saw some of the famous stores and buildings along there (Trump Towers, Rockefeller center, the V building with lights flashing on the pointy end of the V, Tiffanys) and ended at Central Park before taking a cab back to the truck and having a bite to eat. It was glitzy, bright, lights everywhere and certainly had I'll admit I could see why some people enjoy it there.
We got back late and were up at 6am to have breky with some of Josh's friends and finish up some of his work. And so began a long "day." We rushed back home by 11 and were off to Newark to catch our flight. We started winging our way Amsterdam way at 4pm and 6.5 hrs later arrived there. We had a 4hr layover, before jumping our next flight to here. That took us 8hrs and was just as painful. So I think if I do the math right that was a whopping 42 ish hours with a few cat naps. I don't feel too bad right now //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
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////////////////////////////////////////////// uoppp-head hit the keyboard for a moment... The flight from Amsterdam to Nairobi was cool. I saw the Alps taper off as we got over Itilia and then the Mediterranean. Once we hit Africa I'm sure we spent 2.5hrs going over sand. I was amazed how much there was. I think I vaguely remember hearing this somewhere, but I saw it; irrigation booms out in the middle of some of the northern parts of Egypt or Tunisia or whereever we flew over.
Our arrival was uneventful. We saw a guy with a AK47 and Josiah saw a guy with a spear. The four of us stayed in a nice place in downtown Nairobi and up to now none of us have been robbed. We are taking the train out to Kisumu (also known as "the poison" town) later today. Up until then we are exploring Narirobi. I'll admit I was apprehensive about all this but it I'm pretty excited now. Really nice people (they may just want our money? - I'll keep a check on being cynical for the moment) and nice landscapes, and it isn't anywhere near as hot as I thought. 25C!
That's all for now! Gotta run!
Evan
I arrived in Newark NJ safely (with only a short delay at customs in the Twin Cities-the guys pulled me off and grilled me because I didn't have the address for where I was staying in NJ. A few lie detector tests later they let me go!). I met Josiah another guy that will be joining us for part of the time to Kenya (four of us total going. Josh, his Dad, Josiah and I). Josiah, Josh and I alll did some lanscaping stuff beside Long Island yesterday to help Josh tidy up some of the loose ends he has prior to leaving. Very nice view of the bay. Josiah is from a small town in Oklahoma and has been known to poop out of trees and smoke rabbit tobacco among the other crazy things they do in the woods of Oklahoma. They're both great guys and we should have a great time. We're going into NYC later today before we leave tomorrow. Talk to you all later. Love ya, Evan
